5 Ways To Know If You Should Ditch your Dude
You love your dude so much, but sometimes you wonder if the feeling is mutual. Maybe you know that he loves you, but you are not always sure if he “likes” you all that much. Does he treat you with the same intent, desire and attention that you give to him? Does he do little things to let you know that he cares, or could he care less about your needs. There are so many reasons that people stay in relationships that aren’t great. There are also people who are in relationships that are not great but they are blinded by other benefits of the relationship and don’t know that a breakup is inevitable. If you have that nagging feeling that maybe you are not with “Mr. Right” then this article is for you. If you have a friend who is blinded by love and needs a wake up call, forward this over right now.
Your dude comes home with something for himself but nothing for you.
Has it ever happened that your dude comes home from being out at the grocery store or getting food to-go and does not bring anything home to you? He felt hungry and decided to take care of his needs but while making decisions as to what to eat, did he think to call you and ask what you would like as well? Maybe he tries to pretend like he didn’t forget by saying “I got a large fry to share with you”, but you know that you never crossed his mind. Maybe he gets defensive or angry and argues that you shouldn’t feel bad for being overlooked. Maybe he runs into the convenience pay for gas and comes back to the car with a drink or candy for himself and nothing for you? If any of these types of scenarios have happened more often than not, you need to ditch this dude. Find someone who gives you a second thought.
Your dude has regular human flaws but will not admit them.
Nobody’s perfect and we all have flaws and quirks that make up our unique personalities. The trick for both people in a relationship isn’t to find someone who is flawless, but rather someone who appreciates you regardless of your flaws and maybe even helps you get over some of them to be be better person for yourself. An example would be someone who is disorganized and chronically late. For some people organization and time management does not come naturally or easily. While you might walk in the door and set the car keys in the same place every time, maybe your guy tosses them down wherever and then when it is time to leave again, he is late due to looking for his keys. If you are a person who cares, you may suggest to your dude that he use the small basket by the door to set his keys in and you might even give him friendly reminders now and then. If he gets angry that you are trying to make him look bad or nagging him, he is not the kind of companion that you want to try and have an honest relationship with. If he goes around the house blaming the “stupid keys” for being lost or accuses someone else of moving them so he can’t find them, this dude is not the kind of guy you should want to form a relationship with. If a guy can’t laugh at himself and admit that he isn’t perfect, he is not the right guy for you and you should ditch him now.
Your dude talks badly about your family.
For this point we are assuming that you are in a relationship with your family where you do spend time together often or even just for holidays and special events. If your dude is uncomfortable around your family or has different vastly opinions and views than your family, this is something to talk to you about. Your dude should be coming to you to ask for your help in suggesting how you think that he and your family can get along. He wants to be with in a relationship with you and also sees the importance of your having a relationship with your family. If he constantly has mean things to say about your family members that are based solely on his own judgement, he is not going to be a person to have in your life. If he demeans the people that mean the most to you, there is no way that your future can include him. You have to ditch this dude and find someone who respects family and respects you.
Your friends don’t like your dude.
Think about the physical and emotional rush that love and lust can have over a person. Passion is thrilling and feeling loved is a human need. It is not surprising that you might not see your dude from a different viewpoint like your friends do. If one friend who knows you well and treats you well decides to open up to try and protect you from making a mistake or getting hurt, you should listen. Take a step back and try to evaluate this dude’s traits that your friend says are not good for you. If you have more than one friend who thinks that they see warning signs or just plain don’t like the dude, then ditch him. Trying to make a life long relationship with someone that who is not liked by your friends is never going to work. Friends are forever and will be with you throughout your life. You can’t let them go over a guy.
Your dude doesn’t give you credit and doesn’t build you up.
Have you ever been with a group of friends and your dude tells everyone the joke that you just told him earlier that day? But he doesn’t mention that he heard the joke from you? Instead he basks in the attention and laughter of your friends and takes credit for the fun. Maybe he uses your ideas to look important in front of other people but leaves out the part that he originally heard it from you. Sometimes you both get a compliment on a project that you worked on together but he talks as if he is the one responsible for the job and worthy of the praise. Have you both gone in on a present but when you both are thanked your dude steps forward and acts like it was all his idea or that he paid for it alone? Maybe you both did some gardening and the yard looks great but when the neighbors walk by and take notice, he never mentions that you helped at all. If your dude is so rude that he doesn’t acknowledge your contributions in front of others he is either insanely insecure or insanely egotistical. Either way, you can build a life with insanity and being devalued. Ditch the dude and go find someone who lets people know how great he thinks you are instead.
Did these 5 points help you find some insight to your current relationship? Is your dude everything you think that you need or is he lacking in some really important areas? If you are honest with yourself and take a fresh look at your guy, does he think he is “all that” and forget about you? Does he blame other people for his mistakes and take the good credit away from you? Maybe your friends and family can feel that even though you feel the sparks, long term this is not the guy for you. So is he a keeper or do you need to ditch your dude?
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